Émilie Notéris


First, for the genus Orchis. The reader may find the following details rather difficult to understand; but I can assure him, if he will have patience to make out this first case, the succeeding cases will be easily intelligible.
-Charles Darwin, Fertilisation of Orchids, 1862

“There are such queer things about orchids," he said one day; "such possibilities of surprises”.
-H.G. Wells, The Flowering of the Strange Orchid, 1894


Orchistra®: Benefaction by flowering plants



Telling a story like The Sleeper in the Valley is speaking about grass before evoking blood.

Let us proceed.

We are going to demonstrate you the whole range.

Nothing dealing with any cosmetic brand; but a tool of control.

The poisonous, the toxic.

Because criminals always cultivate orchids or bonsais to calm their nerves.

Well there are many examples, for sure, but there, I’m thinking about Linderman.

>Orchis in Greek means testicles< >Easy to check out< //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// Ornamental testicular greenhouse culture as lethal incubation device. ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Botany for nerds

It breathes in infrared, underhand chlorophylling along aerial axis, ambitioning inner walls.

Lacunar stock inventory:

Shewerewolf® Orchid

The Lunar Prospector or Acampe papillosa, is crippled by cinetic craters & indented sharp Gillette labellum… She wore dark and sticky down. Her slobbery fullmooned ovoid blooming increases her subterranean framework tubers, encircling her nocturnal prey, catching it with her grapples again.

Poppyzbrite® Orchid She’s a saprophyte and nourishes herself essentially with decomposed organisms provided by the Shewerewollf® Orchid. Her extreme milky-white complexion is blackened with ebony ink.

Lombroso® Orchid

The Cattleya aurantiaca wears Betadine yellow scars, she’s unswervingly scanning and morphotyping every criminal she finally saves or blows the whistle on Mörderunteruns® Orchid —depending on her horoscope.

MachinegunKelly® Orchid

By product of an hybridation between a lady's slipper and a Charles Bronson cowboy boot, she chickens out while west-facing an encaged puma. She could fire off but she will rather sloppily surrender.

Mörderunteruns® Orchid Dracula lotax is goblet shaped, each of her petals and sepals are polishing into distinguished satanic stems. She systematically grabs everything coming too close to her lip.

Talmakademie® Orchid

Apostasia Blume has recourse to a doctoral dobermankind ton. She oversees full Orchid team. She’s the only one who could stop Mörderunteruns® Orchid while she’s at it. She can’t bear natural light and requires a personal screen composed of stained glass like Nasir-al-Mulk mosque (Shiraz-Iran).

Ghostsofmars® Orchid

Vanda lamellata, variety which die-cuts bits of anyone starring obscenely at her for more than 20 seconds. She’s nicely taking care of MachinegunKelly® Orchid survivors.

Chuckpalhaniuk® Orchid

Dactylorhiza maculata is particularly moody and unmanageable, her killing patterns are miscellaneous, and she has no proper modus operandi. She tried to commit suicide several times.

Poison exhales ultraviolet harnessing, adjusting solar entrapments between hyper transparent Crystal Palace dislocations.

It’s no longer a sloterdijkian metaphor.

It’s visually effective, it’s operating on the real, in direct live.

It’s not relay broadcasted.

It’s here.

No needs for communicational higher-bids.

No announcement effect.

No elections.

No vote.

The greenhouse is located in Antarctica, Guatemala, Ardèche, or Sudan (impossible to confirm).

It makes no odds; soon there will be no more sky, only a glass horizon.

Tropical diorama forest.

There are still some temporary autonomous zones in which atmosphere is not yet sterilized. (TAZ-WAINYS)

To be honest, we are still waiting for certain species extinction (Phœnicopterus ruber ruber as red as the shrimps it ingurgitates, marshmallow hibiscus: Daitoksawhalip cultivars, crossbreed lard truffle pigs, cherry-laurel: No! Daphne won’t come through this time, death’s-head moth sphinx…) before the environmental pasteurization phase. (EPP)

Pulsed electric field processing (PEFP) cold start nuclear irradiation (CSNI). //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// Environment: a post- industrial challenge. ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

A few years ago (impossible to precise) we were still refusing to plant our orchard with wind turbines, but now, rotors imperturbably dither in high-sea, constantly covered by albatrosses flight and other puffins detached in shadow puppets —those submarine plains helped us finance the project— money exudation.

(Side view of a monk puffin, sprats swarm disgorging from the beak)

When I’m talking about high-sea, sorry, it doesn’t mean anything right now.

I wanted to say: relatively taken away from national real estate complexes on territorial stilts (RTAFNREC-OTS).

An hour at the most by Hydrospace Racing Jet Ski, one hand on the back, blindfolded.

No Waterworld, no, more like Zaha Hadid.

You see?

Thus they are friendly aligned a la Leni Riefenstahl along the perfectly rectilinear paths covering Burberry New York, brooding in cooperation with herbaceous taken in this crystal trap.

Ventilators pales answer to more distant wind turbines.

And still this background noise, this ceaseless ryojiikeda humming at the very beginning of detached auricles. But you will become used to it very quickly. We are glad you noticed our advert upon the TAZ-WAINYS scattered tracts & that your oceanographic Calypso craft (former Ballard Marine Railway Company engine) has docked so easily.

We need an emeritus toxicologist. (editors note)

The previous one tried to escape (not so far) by swimming (butterfly), taking away the results of his research; Ghostsofmars® Orchid has been so fulfilled.

He stupidly exceeded the weekly tolerable provisional dose (WTPD).

You should be toxicovigilant.

You’ll be submitted to the Glasgow-Liege scale (GLS) every day.

Attention deploying itself spontaneously, as bat vampire wings approaching of a prey, is a good indication of motivation in most of the situations that you will have to dread.

Our boarders are not only there to feed the orchids or to take dust as Chippendales letting the dust settle, they are going to allow the elaboration of a chemical compound multiplying tenfold criminal drives.

Spreading —as Demeter— multicolored capsules as if they were confectionery in the TAZ-WAINYS to increase survivors killing.

This project you’re featuring in is called Killcandy® (under copyright).

We are now taking you to your living quarters and abandoning you to Ditavonteese® Orchid.

Ditavonteese® Orchid

You can freely pluck her petals from the anthers to the floral receptacle; she displays refined stratagems (visual, olfactory and sexual gulls). Her favorite beverage is Martini. She’s pale and carbonaceous, imperceptibly old fashioned she wriggles listening to Black metal.

Ditavonteese® Orchid is our best recruit (like Mystique for the X-Men), once she establishes contact with the pharmacologist, she’ll distil an irresistible psychotropic substance; we forgot to mention that she’s a hybrid (datura wrightii). Ditavonteese® Orchid will assist us maintaining our dear friend here enough time to elaborate the Candykilling® process.

Then we will deliver Ditavonteese® to Shewerewollf® & Chuckpalhaniuk®. Poppyzbrite® Orchid will do loam transformation phase.


But he has to relax like a marmota monax until the Groundhog Day; we’ll be waiting for the rising of the dwarf star.

Émilie Notéris is a french writer born in 1978.
Her work already appeared in Sleepingfish 8.
She's the author of a novel 'Cosmic Trip' 2008 (IMHO) and directed a J.G. Ballard anthology with Jérôme Schmidt in 2008 'J.G. Ballard, Hautes Altitudes' (è®e).
She's currently writing a non-fiction 'Fétichisme Postmoderne' for La Musardine.

1 comment: